On strip clubs...

So the boyfriend was invited to another bachelor party last weekend, and we all know what that means...

Iced Frappucinos and The Notebook on DVD.

Well, that and strip clubs.

Here's my thing about strip clubs. Sure, there's the whole "degrading to women and maintains their place in a submissive and serving role, with the goal of sex and domination resulting in a never ending cycle of sexual violence and the inability of women to truly ever be equal with men.." thing, but that's not even where I'm going with this.

The real problem? Women have NO equivalent.

Seriously. Have you ever been to a male strip club? I haven't either. Why? Because the thought is hysterical. Why would I want to do that? When women go to strip clubs, they go to laugh. They go to sit with their girlfriends and laugh. It has nothing to do with sex, or arousal or something forbidden. The idea of some ripped guy shaking his stuff in some sort of spandex/poly mix bikini brief type business makes me want to crawl in a hole and die. That is not fun to me. That is awkward and dumb.

If the world was fair and, I'm sorry for this, but if men and women were able to "get away" with the same type of behavior in terms of pre-wedding scandal, the bachelorette party would take place in some sort of multi-roomed facility where, in one room, your ex, in some sort of time-warped ideal version of himself, was making his case for what a fool he'd been, how he'd never love another as much as he loved you, how you were the best thing that ever happened to him, etc. In the next room would sit your first love, and you'd get to re-enact your first kiss and the butterflies you'd get when you'd see him in the hallway at school. In the next room would be the hot guy from your local establishment (insert auto body shop, restaurant, dance club, Starbucks - whatever applies to you).. you know the one. The one who you're pretty sure flirts with you every time you're there and guess what, you kind of like it. He'd be in the next room, with a bouquet of your favorite flowers and your favorite meal prepared - home cooked, naturally. And you could have as many of these guys as you wanted, and they'd all be there to tell you that you're the best thing there is, all while making you laugh all night and engaging you in conversation that mattered. Oh, and at least one of them would be a really good dancer but you'd get to dance with him too and you wouldn't even have to slip $1 bills in their jockey shorts.

Oh, and your girlfriends would be doted on all night as well by a variety of outstanding gentlemen. Naturally.

At the end of the night, sure, you'd walk away from all of them and no, there would be no sex and minus the first kiss re-enactment, no action beyond the occasional hand graze (though, when done right, let's face it, can do wonders) and the dancing. But you'd still have that one night and, well, the physicality wasn't really the point, was it?

So how does that work for you boys? Just curious...