On stubbornness...

Only children and the Irish are known for their stubbornness. As a member of both groups, I knew I'd never be able to escape that fate. But, having convinced myself that I'm a bit of a pushover, I thought I'd somehow magically defied it. You can't be a pushover AND be stubborn, can you?

I realized today that these characteristics are, in fact, mutually exclusive. Just because I'm non-confrontational (and thus, can be a pushover to achieve some level of harmony) doesn't mean that I can't be unwavering and, well, unreasonable.

There is a woman I work with who makes me want to rip my skin off of my body. She is one of two people in my entire life who, the minute she enters the room, I fight the desire to throw punches. Her very presence changes my temperament from friendly and easygoing to cranky and defensive. There are a number of reasons for this, some justified, others not, but it really does take every ounce of energy that I have to maintain civility when she's around.

The worst part? I'm pretty sure she knows it. OK, that's the second worst part. The very worst part? She's trying REALLY hard to make right with me, and I can't find the strength of character to budge.

She just called me over to her office as I walked down the hall. Sometimes I even go a different route to avoid her completely, but she heard my voice so there was no hope this time. Once we worked through some business, she asked what shoe size I wore. "8 1/2" I answered. "Aw, shoot, sure you can't squeeze into an 8?" "No chance," I replied. "Shucks," she said, "I'm cleaning out my closet and had a couple of pairs of shoes I thought you might like. But, wait. What size do you wear for clothes.. are you.. oh.. about a 6?"

Let's get something clear. I'm a fairly healthy girl with an athletic build. But one thing I'm not is a size 6 and that is apparent to pretty much everyone. "That's kind of you, but, no far from it. I wear a (like I'm going to put it in writing!)" "Really? Hmm.. Well, I have this size 8 dress that would look adorable on you but I thought it might be too big. Perhaps not. I'll bring it in for you to try on." "That's kind of you. Thanks for thinking of me," I replied, in as measured a tone as I could muster.

The woman is complimenting my figure and offering me free clothes and I still can't find the strength to just take a deep breath and see her with new eyes. I need some coping techniques, pronto..