On sticking to what you're good at...

I signed up for Race for the Cure last week. It was the same day someone told me I looked pregnant and the same day I fully realized I'm turning 30 next year. I'll probably never forget it. Anyway,I went running today to get ready for the race. It's in less than a month.

I'm screwed.

I've done road races before. In fact, 2004 saw me participate in a 5K AND a 10K. The 10K was the longest distance I have ever run. In fact, I didn't run a 10K before the race and haven't run one since and really just relied on race day adrenaline to get me through those 2 miles for which I never trained. Hey, at least it worked out.

So, yah, all in all I probably did close to 2.5 miles, but not all at once. Running outside is so very different than running on a treadmill. I can usually run this on a treadmill no problem, but, alas.

I really just need to accept the fact that I'll probably have to walk part of it. After all, strenuous exercise isn't good for the baby and I don't want to break a hip. Still, I know I'll be super hard on myself.

The problem is I'm a non-runner that grew up in a family of runners. My cousin still holds cross country and track records for our high school, and my dad had something ridiculous like 8 straight years where he didn't miss a day of running. Me? I've just never been able to do it. I tried. I really did. And I remember the look of anticipation on the coaches' faces when I signed up for summer track. And the look of despair when they realized I did not inherit the speedy genes to which my cousin could lay claim.

First off, I don't have a runner's body. Period. I have more of a mud wrestler's body if I had to pick a sport.

Secondly, I really loathe running. Guess that's the more important part. When I was running back home in Maine, and even in Boston, I was able to find some really pretty scenery that, when combined with good music on my headphones, could kind of distract me from that fact. In my current neighborhood, if I go running outside, as I did today, I'm not embraced by tree-lined streets. Despite the fact that I'm on a trail, I run past Reagan National Airport. Nothing like the roaring of jet engines to take you away...

I really want to get through the race. I want to get through the race and not stop. It's not the end of the world if I have to walk, but, having gotten through these things before, if I do have to walk, I'm going to feel like my body is falling apart.

Or I could just continue to train and get better every day. But then what would I complain about?