On a sad thing..

I work in a college admissions office. Today a young woman came in with her mother for an information session. She was recently admitted and intends to enroll for the fall.

The young woman is very bright. If I'm being honest, brighter than a lot of the students we work with. I didn't think anything of her visit, rather, enjoyed hearing the laughter, at least that's what I thought it was, that was coming from the meeting room where they were gathered with a member of my staff. I was glad she was enjoying herself.

The staff member who conducted the session called me into her office after they left. "Can you smell that?"

"Yeah," I replied, "What IS that?"

"Alcohol. Her mother was drunk."

Eight years in the business and this is a first.

My colleague couldn't say enough about the young woman, but she chattered nervously throughout their meeting so her mother couldn't say anything. Her mother yelled and wept throughout the session, even becoming drowsy at one point. As they walked out of my colleague's office, the mother started grabbing some of our college memorabilia; a mug, a blanket, a lunch tote, out of her office before she walked out the door. The daughter apologized and tried to get it back; my colleague said, "It's no problem.. well, except for the blanket."

I'll confess we laughed a little bit about the mother's "shopping spree".

I feel desperately sad, appalled really, and aching for this young woman to get on campus so she can feel what it's like to be normal, and learn who she is, outside of a caretaker for her mother. To be in a place where she only needs to worry about herself.

As someone whose Irish-Catholic family has worked hard at times to keep the alcoholic stereotype alive, you'd think I couldn't be shocked anymore. But I haven't stopped thinking of it ever since, and all I've done is pray to the great whatever that the student was the one who took the car keys on the way home.

I get that alcoholism is an illness; I get that hitting rock bottom is usually the only way out. But I'm enraged by the selfishness of the sick nevertheless. I hope today was her rock bottom.